Got this from one of those baby sites that I subscribe to and thought I would share it with all those expecting another bundle of joy as it is pretty applicable to our family as D-Day draws nearer:
Be aware that your daughter will need plenty of attention to assure her that she is not being replaced by a newer model.
1. Plan on
giving her plenty of one-on-one time with Daddy. Though it is not
inevitable, close spacing (less than three years) can create friction
between siblings because both will have high needs for parental
attention.
2. Read books about babies. You will still have undivided
attention to give to her, which will help her adjust to a new situation.
Begin reading books to her about babies coming into the family and talk
with her about the baby in utero. Though she will not completely
understand, she will be primed for the baby's arrival.
3. Stagger the
timing of changes. If a new bedroom or bed is required, make this change
at least four to six weeks before she becomes a big sister. Your
daughter will be less likely to associate her new room or bed with
displacement. Any changes that you believe necessary should not coincide
with the new baby's arrival.
4. Encourage her regular contact with
babies. Teach her the concept "gentle" in touching babies, as well as
other living things such as cats and dogs. This will help her get some
practice in before she becomes a big sister.
5. Allow her to still be a
baby. Despite the fact that she will become a big sister, do not rob her
of her own baby-toddlerhood. Don't assume that she must sleep in a bed
instead of a crib, especially if she still enjoys and feels comforted by
the crib she is now using. Continue to diaper her and offer her the
bottle or breast, if you're breastfeeding. She is still very much a baby
herself! Expect her to want to be held and even play "baby" by being
cuddled and cooed in your arms.
6. Expect moodiness. Don't be alarmed if
she seems more clingy or crabby than usual. She will need to express
herself and see that her place in the family is still secure. With time
and your consideration, she will adapt and gain a sense of mastery
(rather than jealousy) about her new role in the family.
7. Remind her
that she was a baby too. Show her pictures of herself, the attention she
got and the gifts that she received when she was a new baby.
8. Buy a
few special toys. It may also help to buy a few gifts that are just for
her, so that when you are receiving gifts for the baby and attention is
being showered on the newborn there is something for her.
9. Encourage
her to help once the baby is born. This will give her a sense of
competence. She can bring a diaper to Mommy, take an adult by the hand
to show the new baby or giving the baby a toy.
10. Show her the benefits
of being a big girl. Involve her in activities she can do which
separate her from the new baby and give her the message that she can do
certain things because she is not a newborn. Sitting on your lap and
pointing to pictures as you read, putting a simple puzzle together or
other activities appropriate to her development will continue her
excitement in her own growth and the things she can do now that she
could not do as a baby.
Whether a new child is being born or a teenager
is leaving for college, transitions in families require profound
physical and psychological adjustments. Family researchers have
identified changes in daily family household membership to be the most
stressful. It's natural for your toddler to regress during this time.
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